Thursday, September 27, 2012

Mean Girls

Kayla loves preschool and is always very excited to go.  When I pick her up she tells me about her friends, Maiwen, Johanna, and Genevieve (deciphering those names was nothing short of a miracle for me and I had to check out the names on the backpack hooks at the preschool to figure out Maiwen).
Today Braden and I picked her up from school and she promptly told us about how she got to play on the playground - her favorite activity in the world.  We asked her what she did on the playground and she said, "Mary Jane said 'I'm not your friend.'  Then I was sad and went..." and she mad a very sad face.  Um, what?!  How can a three-year-old say that?  It just about broke my heart.  What do I do?  I wanted to go back there and ask the teachers if they knew there was a mean girl in their class.  I want to look up that girl's phone number and talk to her mother about what kinds of things she is teaching her daughter and needs to teach her to be kind.  I want to protect my daughter from the sting of mean girls.  Realistically, I know this will not be the last time someone is mean to her.  It breaks my heart that she is being forced to learn that some people aren't very nice at such a young age.  We asked her what she did when this little girl wasn't very nice and she just answered that she was sad and made another sad face.  How I wish I could shield her from these hurts.  I know she isn't perfect and I'm sure that sometimes she hurts other kids' feelings too, but "I'm not your friend"?  Ouch.
We went and played on a playground with some friends this evening.  I think that helped end the day on a good note.  Hopefully she won't dwell too much on this mean girl (because all mothers know that I am dwelling on it enough for the both of us!).  But mostly, I hope that she can learn that it is important to be nice to everybody, even the mean girls (but maybe stay away from the mean girls if being nice isn't working).

6 comments:

Charity said...

Sorry. It's not an easy thing as a mom to see your children treated unkindly by others.

BTW, Maiwen's mom is a good friend of mine, and her big brother is Daniel's friend, and big sister is Eliza's friend. I'm assuming there's only one Maiwen in Peoria : ).

Charity said...

Sorry. It's not an easy thing as a mom to see your children treated unkindly by others.

BTW, Maiwen's mom is a good friend of mine, and her big brother is Daniel's friend, and big sister is Eliza's friend. I'm assuming there's only one Maiwen in Peoria : ).

Chad Balls said...

Grrr, that makes me mad! Kayla is the nicest, unassuming little girl! Em has had the same problems. Especially this year. I just always point out how sad it makes her and to make sure she doesn't make anyone that sad. I hope it sticks.

Laurie said...

Kayla is such a sweet girl. It breaks my heart to think that anyone would hurt her. Girls can be so mean!

Melanie said...

Love the pic of Kayla.
At least the mean girl didn't shove her like Landon always did :) Sometimes nice moms have mean kids no matter what they try to do. Although Landon is getting much nicer and hasn't hit a kid in nursery yet!

Leslie M said...

Much sympathy going out to you. I HATE THIS STUFF.

As the mother of three daughters I'm halfway to my PhD in Mean Girls. Check out girlsleadership,org for when Kayla is a bit older, or read Rachel Simmons' books now. GLI did programs in our area and they may do them in yours now or in time. Also, you can read my blog for my lessons learned. www.threepinks.blogspot.com.

Leslie Morris (your mom's neighbor)